home

So I go to Sunnybrook Community Church here at home and they often have different ways to reach out to others whether it is in our own community or across the world. Right now we are doing a challenge associated with World Vision. It’s called the Matthew 25 challenge and it’s based off of the scripture Matthew 25:35-36: “For I was hungry, and you fed me. I was thirst, and you gave me a drink. I was a stranger, and you invited me into your home. I was naked, and you gave me clothing. I was sick, and you cared for me. I was in prison, and you visited me.” Based off this scripture; on Monday we skipped lunch and broke our fast at dinner with rice and beans. Tuesday the only beverage we could have was water. Today (Wednesday) we have to sleep on the floor, tomorrow we have to wear the same clothes we wore today, Friday we are to reach out to someone going through a difficult time, and Saturday we are to take a 30-minute prayer walk.

So today I am writing to tell you about my experiences thus far.

Monday: “For I was hungry, and you fed me…”

     Reflecting on my experience today, it’s funny to think that the first thing I heard someone say was “I don’t like beans, but I’ll eat some rice.” Not very often do we stop to think about all those we could take the time to feed, however, we rarely ask if they’ll like what’s provided. I doubt people who live off of rice and beans truly like rice and beans. They eat to stay alive. This brings about another comical trend in our lives; we’ve created a word to describe just how hungry we are and to excuse our possible sour attitudes. Hangry. We are accustomed to becoming “angry” when it’s honestly probably only been an hour since we last ate. There are people who are too tired to be “angry” because it has been DAYS since they last ate. As I type this my husband is feeding one of our cats. For the second time today. We feed our pets but when do we feed others? When do we feed our souls?

Tuesday: “…I was thirsty, and you gave me a drink.”

     Today I drank only water. No leftover cereal milk, no juice, no latte, only water. This wasn’t much different from a lot of my days, however reflecting on the minimum 6k walk it takes to get dirty water for some prompted me to be grateful for the filtered, running water that I can get from my own hoe. This beverage that I often find bland and unappetizing I take for granted fuels my body and sustains life all around me.

Wednesday: “…I was a stranger, and you invited me into your home.”

     Tonight I will be sleeping on the floor so I imagine  I’ll have a little more perspective tomorrow, however World Vision has sent out some discussion prompts:

     1. If you had to leave your home, what would you miss most about your home?

          I’m sure this answer would be different if this wasn’t a hypothetical but I’m not sure what the real answer is. Having gone to basic training, AIT, Mexico, India, and Nicaragua I can say that what I’ve missed most about being in the area I’ve called is the comfort and freedom I’ve felt to let go and be myself. In all these areas you are with acquaintances or strangers that you want to be respectful towards, that you want to make comfortable so you often put yourself out to make others happy….which ironically just stresses everyone out but no one is very good at crossing that bridge.

          In a more tangible sense I think I might miss my couch. I find myself there at least once a day with my blanket either taking a nap, reading a book, studying, watching TV…you name it. It’s probably my favorite place to be in the house.

     2. What would you take with you?

     My kittens. I mean, they are my babies. I’d miss them the most if I had to leave them. They are so loving and affectionate. I seriously can’t imagine my life without them at this point.

     3. How would it feel to be a stranger in a new place?

     Hard. Alone. Alienated. Uncomfortable. Wild. Adventurous. Curious. Exciting. Obviously my emotions depend on the circumstances. But even in positive situations being a strangers can be awfully lonesome and difficult and uncomfortable. But in an effort to make a bad situation good you’d try to look for the adventure, the new things, the new comforts. Either way there’s a lot of adjustment that needs to happen and a lot of hard questions you need to ask yourself in order to get through it.

So the other night we were reflecting as a group and the idea of inconvenience got brought up. Now, I prefer the idea of uncomfortable but to each their own. I am going to stick with inconvenience for this blog because I have a little ditty for ya. We were talking about how when we have been here plans have changed, the heat has been intense, sleeping corridors not ideal, etc. So the point was how this is an inconvenience to most Americans. Some felt that it was the big trips that were truly inconvenient others felt that you could be inconvenienced at home. I personally believe that you can be inconvenienced at home (this is really why I prefer uncomfortable- I don’t believe helping anyone is an inconvenience but bare with me here). I believe that only doing big trips isn’t an inconvenience at all, it is a bit of a vacation. You go to a land you’ve never seen before and experience a lifestyle you’ve never lived before and if you don’t like it, you know it’s going to end. When you help out at home it’s something you see each day. The more you help the more you see and you can’t change that; your awareness increases. That’s uncomfortable (inconvenient). I think it’s important to do both the big trip and the at home duties. To really make a difference it has to be a lifestyle, not just a once in awhile thing.

To shed a little more light on this idea of ‘inconvenient’ I give you the following:

In search of wholeness
Never giving in to the temptation of simplicity, ease, and luxury
Constantly digging deeper into yourself begging for the ability to give all of yourself
Open to the turbulence caused by life, society, culture, religion, and economics
Needing more and feeling emptier and emptier
Veraciously fighting for the needs of others in all the ways you are ableErroneously believing that another trip will fill the hole in your spirit
Not accepting less than your best
Inconveniencing yourself for the betterment of another
Effectively loving everyone as you love yourself
No. The word you won’t accept
Tethering pieces of yourself to every part of the world, every person you meet, and losing yourself.

              INCONVENIENT

So I am going to plagiarize myself one more time. This post and the last post were posted on a different blog for school but who knows how many of you are reading that. Besides I want my work to show up with my name, so why not publish it here too?

It’s still pertaining to my time in Nicaragua so it’s a service based mind frame that I am writing from. It has been a couple of days since I wrote this and I’m not sure if it is because we are getting closer to the end or if it’s because of who we are but I can already tell that the idea of rekindling friendships has been put out. It’s always funny to see how things develop. Nonetheless, I still feel that this piece holds a lot of truth and is relevant. Plus, it’d be nice to be wrong.

Again, I hope you enjoy!

The Sound of Silence

We all have been really good at talking about the service we are doing. Talking about the people and lifestyles we are seeing. We talk about the learning we’ve done. We talk about the illness, the poor, the rich, the needy, the helpless. But that’s what everyone does when they go on a trip like this. It’s like an unspoken rule, you must focus on everything outside of you. But what about that sound of silence? What about those moments when we are all speechless? When it seems we have nothing to say, what is really being said? Have we really been reflecting or have we actually been deflecting? It’s possible some have been projecting but if they have, why? Why can’t we all be honest about how we are feeling and about what we are thinking? What I am trying to get to is that there is a lot going on within ourselves that we are not talking about. 

Some of us are changing in our hearts and minds and it’s a beautiful thing. This is very difficult to talk about. We aren’t trained to talk about it. Very rarely can a person actually identify the changes going on inside them. They don’t see how their opinions are changing, how their techniques are changing, how very small pieces within them are changing. But sometimes we do see the change. We see it, we feel it, but we still can’t quite articulate it. I think this is ok. It’s something we have to let happen, don’t try to control it. This change often happens in the silence. Kind of like the butterfly effect; a small change in our cores that will forever impact the people we are and the people we become.

All of us are changing in our relationships. This one is more superficial. It’s easier to see, and some try to fight it, some try to embrace it. We are a group of random people. Yes, we all came from the same physical therapy school and yes we all spent the last two years together but we are random. Some of us were good friends for a while and then we weren’t. Some of us rarely talked and now we prefer each others’ company over everyone else’s. Some of us were fearful that this would be a lonely trip, one spent constantly being the odd man out. From where I sit, there’s a lot changing that we aren’t acknowledging. We are rekindling friendships, we are starting new friendships, and we are all making an effort to be patient and try again fresh every day. We all still have quirks that annoy someone else but we all have a little more understanding too. If I were a betting man, I’d say this won’t last. We will return home and interact only when necessary. It’s a sad truth. This sound of silence, it needs to break through like a shattering glass wall. If we can break this sound of silence, our relationships will be that much more profound; we can truly connect and grow.

​✌🏼 extravagantly simple